Tag Archives: The Tot’s Cafe

The Mom Escape

Where do we find our escape from the craziness of motherhood? How do we not give all ourselves to our child where it becomes unhealthy for us? I am on a quest to find these answers.

I am a mother who owned her own business, moved to England, had a baby and moved back to the US and stayed home with my child. When I arrived back to the US, I had sold my business, had no family near me and my friends at that time were all single with no children. It was one lonely and hard path for me. What I did have was a beautiful baby boy, whom I focused my attention. Then my son starts growing up and not so needy, but I am still giving my all to him. I was about to go nuts…what happened to that woman on the go and in love with life? That was my question to myself and still my question.

Now my son is in Nursery School and I have the mornings to do what I need, I use this time to conduct business, write blogs, film and “trying” to get back into the swing of entrepreneurship again.

Being in the inquiry of what is missing, some solutions came up. One is my workouts. Usually a ritual of working out has been in my life and now has disappeared. As humans, a workout is important for vitality. Getting that blood flowing will do anyone some good.

Another thing I am missing are my friends. Just finding the space to go out and be with the “women” is a healthy outlet. I find it important to be with your friends, it brings a mental health and community. As humans, we must have community.

To start with just those two things can make the world of difference. On this path of finding the healthy medium of Motherhood and sense of self is a journey. If anyone has their own journey of finding self, I would love to interview you. Please share as other Mother’s experience do matter and we all can learn from each other.

Tots in the Woods (Season 2 Episode 3)

The Tot’s Cafe Show interviewed Jodi Levine, Founder and Executive Director of Earthroots Field School regarding the importance of children learning in nature.

Jodi has traveled all over the world learning from cultures outside our own and found that improving the relationship with the land is important. She has inherited a passion to share earth’s gifts with children.

She states “I am continuously seeking education on progressive energy alternatives, ways to replenish the soil with water, ways to build tightly woven interdependent webs of community, and ensuring our children are accepted for who they are and are treated with respect.”

Full 30 minute Episode will be available soon. Stay Tuned.

Tot’s Cafe Hang Out Spot

Paradise Perks is one of our favorite coffeehouses in the OC.  Check out the short interview with one of the employees of the Paradise Perks Espresso & Tea Bar.

 

WATCH IT HERE:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ek2oGnRhYuw

Episode 4- Praise and Rewards with Tracy Roberts

Season 1, Episode 4  PRAISE & REWARDS
Are you ready to hear things that may be a surprise to you? In this interview with Tracy, she gives us rich information on the effects and outcomes of giving rewards.  We also find out why parents feel its okay to overpraise children.  Based on the findings of Alfie Kohn, Author of Punished by Rewards


WATCH EPISODE 4: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ItoLWBQkhpg

View the Interview on Facebook

Confident Children through Attachment

Have you heard the term, “Attachment Parenting?”  Find out from Jeannie Lee, a successful Attachment Parent and The Tot’s Cafe interviews her to find out what success methods she and many others have used to raise their children.  We learn that by being an Attachment Parent, our children become more confident.

Watch the interview here on Monday, October 10 at 8:00 PST.
Can also catch this show on our Facebook Page

Looking in Europe

Just In!  Chimmy has sent more photos of places he has traveled in one European country.  The above pic is one of the first places he visited at the beginning of the week.  Then he ended up in the big city.  For Chimmy, he does not speak this country’s language so he found an interpreter to travel with him and made the rest of his trip adventurous.

If you guess which country in Europe Chimmy is in you can Win a Free “Chimmy Travels to Europe” book, written by Patricia Paigerac.

During Chimmy’s travels he has visiting this lovely palace, a famous museum that looks like a pyramid, an opera house, and toured this country’s capital city and ate plenty of cheese and fine cuisines.

Our little monkey friend said that this country is famous for their cheese and wines but Chimmy doesn’t drink wine so he could not report on how wonderful the wine actually is.

The Tot’s Cafe will award the first person who guesses where in Europe Chimmy is visiting, with Patricia Paigerac’s book, “Chimmy Travels to Europe.”  (to win please comment with your answer on this blog) This book is chalk full of vivid pictures, foreign languages, maps and more that will teach your toddler the wonders of our world and appreciate the many foreign languages spoken in Europe.

There are many other educational books available, visit www.chimmy5in1.com

Child Led Way

Your baby won’t be a baby forever. “The Continuum Concept,” written by Jean Liedloff, has been one of the most influential books since my daughter was born. It talks about the child-led way of raising children and how that builds their sense of security, confidence and trust in parents for not forcing them or shaming them to do what they are not ready to do.

One question that arises from parents is “What about forcing the child to sleep in another room?” I know there are many books that provide strategies to enforce that children sleep in their own room, after reading the Continuum Concept, I felt that I would rather have my child express a desire for her own room, than me force her to stay in another room.  I’m not alone. More and more parents are choosing to listen to their child’s choices for comfort and security.

Then there is the potty training. If I had stuck with the Elimination Communication method, my little one would be using the toilet consistently at the age of 2-years. Due to the use of diapers, the bodily functions were ignored since birth. Recently she is more aware and doesn’t hesitate to let me know that she needs to stop and use the toilet when we are driving in the car.  Again, people make comments, “She is already 2 and not potty trained! Come on mama. Get with it!” Actually, the shift to using the toilet isn’t truly potty training. Well, I guess I could be training her if I bribed her with candy or stickers or treats for using the toilet, but she isn’t an animal to train.  Since it is now up to her to get into the habit and gain consistent awareness of having to use the toilet, all I can do is make sure the environment supports her. She is getting the hang of it on her own and won’t be in diapers forever.

Some moms choose to allow their child to self-wean. Babies that are weaned early may not want the use of a bottle or pacifier and some will.  Just yesterday a Mom told me she blamed the dog for chewing up her son’s bottle to completely move him to a sippy cup and how distressed that he was for many days after. My daughter self weaned very early.  Now at 2 she drinks from cups and still wants a bottle when she is upset, sleepy or to go to fall sleep. No big deal…I know she will let go of the bottle when she is ready emotionally and physically.

I recall when I was about 8, my 5 year old brother had a security blanket that he kept with him all the time. He was like Linus. I would over hear my parents complain about the blanket more than a few times and scheme to throw it away or bribe him with a new one. One day they did throw it away. I still remember my brother’s traumatic reaction. I understand my parents were caught up in what other people would say or think. Too bad that sometimes matters. We will never know how the internal stress of being forced will affect a child and stay with them into adulthood.  The long term effects can be profound if they are forced before they are ready to do anything. Trust is vital to a parent-child relationship.  No child or adult will trust any person who repeatedly attempts to force or manipulate.

We do know that little children will be sleeping in their own bed, out of diapers, off the baby bottle and done with their blankie soon enough, in their own short and delicate time of being a little child. The very least of our worries should be that our baby will be the only adult on the planet with baby habits.

NOTE about the Elimination Communication Method otherwise known as EC is about taking the baby to the toilet from birth and involves tuning into baby’s potty urge queues/communications (squirming when nursing). It’s also putting them over a toilet or pot first thing in the morning, before bed even if they don’t go at first. There are a good amount of books and websites on Elimination Communication. You can even find stores and site that sell infant underwear, toilets and other EC items.