Was reading this blog from another mother the other day and she was reminiscing on her childhood and how wonderful it was. She was wondering what happened to our children and parents of today? I have a different point of view. Mom’s and Dad’s of today, it is not the time to listen to people slandering us for our methods of raising our children but learn, manage what we have and enhance our lives with kindness and respect to our children.
In this blog I read, she was reminding about the days where we played outside until or even after dark and we made friends organically. Then she goes on to say that our mother’s today have our children stuck in front of the TV and in the house. I would like to point out to everyone that times have certainly changed from the days of old. From all the child abductions and scarey things that happen to our children, parents today are doing the best for their kids. So our “playdates” works best for us in today’s world of fear. Our children can also make friends in school organically.
Then we have this thing called “new technology,” such as those darn video games and super animated cartoon shows. It is the progression of technology and how do we as parents refrain our kids from participating? Just do not have it in the house. Do not create the demand for them and introduce something new to your children. And for god’s sake spend some time with them. It is up to us to take responsibility and teach our children differently. Have them do creative play. Developing their creative side of the brain enhances their ability to learn as opposed to memorize, problem solve, and their need for “things” diminish as they will be creative in using the materials they already have such as sticks, old toys and stuff laying around the house or outside. Sounds like Entrepreneurship.
How about the days where kids did not have to wear seat belts and be strapped in? Well guess what folks, we voted for this seat belt law and to top it off, accidents are accidents and we are unable to predict them so I would actually choose to put my child in a seat belt.
How about when you use to put your finger in the electrical socket and you would get a bit of a shock? Yes parents get those plugs to put into the sockets, they are doing it out of safety for their children. My son plays with the sockets and wants to put things in them but at the end of the day, he doesn’t get shocked. He was just curious. We really do not want our children around the electrical sockets good reasons and you are the parent to teach them lovingly that playing with electrical sockets are not safe.
This blog also mentions that back in the “good ole days” her parents cooked home cooked meals in the pan and saying that today’s parents go for take out, fast food and quick microwaved meals. Yes, agreed that the fast and quick meal are all junk food, especially microwaved meals. For fair play to parents today, we have created a society of getting “it” now and quick service. Our demands today are a lot higher as both women and men work and by the time the kids get settled and home, it is off to practice of some sort and by the time the whole family actually gets together it’s 8pm or even later and now its time for bed. The lifestyles today creates a demand for getting food fast and now. Sitting down to a meal, depending on the family’s lifestyle and what works for them, is optimal. If you are a parent who is passionate for the family to sitting down to a meal, schedule it and make it happen. When my Mom grew up, they all had their meals together at the table but guess who cooked it with her Mom and Dad both working? The Nanny cooked, cleaned and did the shopping! Back then in the 60’s was the new trend for women to start working and to maintain the family traditions of sitting down to a meal it took something for them to do this, otherwise hire someone to do it.
What really makes me cringe a bit while I was reading this Mom’s blog is she mentions that parents were not afraid to discipline their kids, meaning spank them. Today there have been many studies that show spanking to discipline is not the answer. The results to that type of discipline create adults who think it is okay to disrespect others and their relationships are based on fear and violence.
I don’t know about you but judgement will always be in our society. Heck, without judgement how are we able to enhance ourselves and our families. We have many types of families these days and parenting styles. There are you attachment parents where you believe the children are to be raised by you and your child as an infant is attached to your body. Love that. The other group of parents are the raw or vegan parents where your children are fed lots of vegetables and supplements based on your value system of not putting toxic foods in your children’s body. Another group are your organic and holistic parents where you put only live in organic and have certain beliefs about who God is. I love that too. Then there are parents who hold the traditions of your family and add value for your kids to hold a tradition. That is lovely. Whatever category you fit in or none of the above the outcome is all the same for all of us….we want our children to be happy and successful children and adults. We do gravitate to our group but that means the like people attract the like and we just created community.
My point is that things have changed in our world today. If we reminiscence in the past and not focus on our children in the present, there is no responsibility. If we want those days back it is our duty to create that as a community. Technology getting in the way? Just don’t buy or participate in it. If you have a community or neighborhood that feels safe to you then allow your kids to go out and make friends. Playdates are the way today plus we get to meet other fantastic people when we all connect on our new technologies such as Facebook and Meetup. Heck, I live in a tiny neighborhood with two other homes and guess what there is no one my son can go out and meet, I need the playdates for my son. If we want changes then it is up to us to create the revolution of that change. Just be careful what you vote for if you do not find it of value.
You are not alone out there Mom’s and Dad’s.